Career Spotlight: Bartending

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A bartender is a person who makes drinks. They also clean.

I interviewed one of these people a few weeks ago, then accidentally left my Macbook air in a cab, then had it returned to me. Finally after all this time, this is how our interview went.

Q: So you’re a bartender. Why.

A: When I bartend I have the choice of whether or not to ignore people. The dining room is bullshit. I hate people.

Q: I’m sure you make drinks for all kinds of crazy people. What is the most ridiculous drink you’ve ever made, and the biggest psycho you’ve ever served.

A: Smurf on the rag. Consists of blue curacao, creme de cacao, grenadine, drizzled down the side of the shot glass.

Q: So it just drips all over your face?

A: I guess.

A: A schizophrenic guy sits here all the time, having conversations with himself.

Anthony: He stabs the plate.

A: He finds himself really funny.

Q: What’s your favourite drink?

A: Mojito. They’re refreshing. Tequila mojitos are the best.

Q: Do those exist?

A: No. But I make them.

Q: So you’re really pretty, what do you wanna do with your life?

A: I wanna be a pretty lawyer.

Q: Which regulars do you hate here?

A: This real estate agent. He came in here and asked me what colour my underwear are in front of his wife.

Q: That’s sick. I’ll have another 8 oz glass of the Pinot Grigio. Thanks.

Thanks unnamed bartender, for helping me create another inspirational career spotlight post. Also, don’t forget to tip your bartender. Have a super cute day everyone!

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