So this is what happens in Spring Breakers


Once upon a time, there were 3 slutty lunatics. Selena Gomez becomes friends with them. They rob some restaurant and go away for Spring Break. Then, things start happening.

They do handstands in the hallway and go to parties. People do coke.


Everyone goes to jail.


Suddenly, James Franco bails them out with his two creepy friends.


Selena Gomez goes home, because she’s a pussy.


James Franco plays a Britney Spears song on a grand piano, while the girls dance around in masks with semi-automatic weapons.


They piss of a black guy and he shoots the weird blonde girl. Then, the last two girls kill everyone, steal the black guy’s Lamborghini and drive away into the sunset.


This is the stuff that dreams are made of. Well, my dreams, at least.





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